Respect in marital life is base, of marriages. Even some believe, it’s more important, than love. Expression of love is valuable, when combines and coincided with couple respect. Think about two individual who love each other but disrespect, one and other. As an observer, you will not find the relationship, attractive, also don’t believe the relation to be, successful and stable in future. But couples, who understand miracles of respect, include it in their relation. They present themselves as, respectful, attractive and lovable couple and will have successful marital life. Differences in marital relationship, is based on, including and following this main element, in law of relationship. In forming longitudinal emotional relations, you should keep respect of your self and your partner. If you expect your partner, to respect you, in return you also should behave respectfully. Maintaining respect in relationships, is not as simple as we think. If you are eager to know, how to maintain respect in relations, read the full article.
: Respect and its meaning in marital relationships
Respect means, politeness, valuableness, recognizing abilities and strengths, recognizing someone’s right, maintaining sanctity. It includes, paying attention, listening. Giving importance to person who’s living with us and we decided to spend our life with her or him forever, are different parts of respect. Real spouse, is person, who loves you, in all situations, and every time respect you and give importance to you. Is love the only element for survival of relationship? love without respect, is very weak and can breaks anytime. Respect is like, building material, which protects family from crisis and difficulties of life.
? What does mutual respect means
Mutual respect, includes protecting reciprocal human rights, In other words, in relationships, physical, sexual and emotional security should be protected, for both sides. Another part, which is essential, is accepting partner as he or she is. Don’t make afford to change the person, by disrespecting.This happens frequent in marital relationships.
Many, men and women, get married, with concept, that can provide changes they expect for spouse. If, we enter relationship, with such concepts, we form, relationships which lacks respect.
: Consequences of disrespect in marital relationships
Win-lose relation, contradictory goals, distorted relation, guilt feelings, self conceit, temporary self proudness and worries, are result of minor disrespects. Among couples, who treat each other in unrespected manner during argues, have more contradictory marital goals, because of not becoming convinced easily. Both, want to prove, they think better. They prefer to be winner, of this battle. To achieve, situation of” I’m winner, you are loser”. These couples, cannot accept, they also can make mistakes. Usually insist to prove their, cleverness, that’s why, if they become loser, they lose their temper and become aggressive. Such thoughts, creates, permanent anxiety. In reality, none of them, wins the argue. In such situations, even If the other party, falls short in the discussion, It results in guilt feeling and worries.
: Consequences of respectful relation
Reciprocal respect, among couples, protect and increase friendliness in their relation. People, who know how to respect others, definitely learned, how to respect themselves, also individual who value others, believe, others are capable of respect. Couples, who respect each other, don’t abuse each other, verbally. Men after returning home contribute in household activities, women try to develop peaceful condition in home. These couples, indicate their friendliness to each other. Their relation is like, establishing, a strong building, which is stable and full of love and affection.
: Respect is a skill
Respect is a skill, that everyone should learn. Relation between, husband and wife, is formed on basis of, trust and honor. love is a result of respect. Respect, has positive association with self-esteem. People with a strong self-esteem, give honor and value to self and others.
? How respect develops, in marital relationships
Respect, doesn’t develops, itself, it should be achieved. When behave, in proper ways to others,other individual, also behave politely to you. We will discuss some essential points, which reinforces respect, in marital relationships:
- Listen to your life partner: simplest way to maintain respect in relationships, is listening. At times, when your partner is eager to describe situations, had happened, during the day or are describing some thing ,in details, try to express, your eagerness. Eye contact, can have good influence on your relation. Withdraw, any activities you are doing and carefully, listen. While talking to your partner, keep cell phones away, and politely listen.These techniques increases and effects your relations.
- Be polite and kind in any situation:when entrering home, despite of any stresses, you confronted during the day, smile and behave politely, with a spouse and children.
- Control your stresses and aggression: Stresses provokes, excitement and weaken immunity system of body. Aggressiont, will hurt you, specially in long time. Learn, aggressive control skills.Forget enmity and hatred. Forgive, mistakes of your spouse. Be aware, nobody is, complete human being.
- Give importance to your spouse, necessity: In emotional relationships, both sides should participate. In same way, that you have expectations, from your spouse, to fulfill your needs, you also should proceed, expectations of your partner. Egotism and selfishness of one, develops feeling of worthlessness, in other person. In long period,it will negativity affects your relations.
- Give a space to individual: Whether you are single or married, in both cases, we have a motional relationships, with other people. Any emotional relations, required, personal space. Allow your partner, to do activities, they are interested in. Don’t restrict them. Developing emotional relationship, doesn’t allow you to spend full 24 hours, with your partner. You, won’t hear the sentence “leave me alone”, if you give a space to your partner.
- Respect, when cofrented, with “no” from your partner: When you requested something and received answer in “no”, don’t insist. Your spouse, has particular reasons and justifications, for her or his decision.
- Discuss your worries with your partner rather than others: Direct discussion regarding your worries, with your spouse, instead of discussing it with others, indicates, your respect, towards your partner. Doing so, encourages other person, to behave in the same way and trust on you.
Finally if husband and wife, respect each other, by giving rights to one and other, in forgiveing, unintentional and minor mistakes and rechecking their own demands, definitely are more satisfied in their relations.
In this article we shared only a small, part of our wide knowledge, of consulting psychologists. We discussed, effects of respect, on marital relationships. Raz-e-Mandegar Center,in association with, experienced consultant psychologists, can guide you in all psychological related problems, especially in difficulties regarding marital relationships.
Translated and Arraged by: Kheyzaran Shahnehpour
Click on the word psychological counseling to download this article.